-
Steve H
308Andrew kicked off a Frivolous Friday thread a couple of years ago, but it kept getting hijacked by off topic posts.Let's give it another go, but be advised, this thread is not for the serious, earnest seeker of wisdom:smile:
Dead Horse?
The tribal wisdom of the Dakota Indians, passed on from one generation to the next, says that when you discover that you are riding a dead horse, the best strategy is to dismount.
But in modern business (and education and government) because heavy investment factors are taken into consideration, other strategies are often tried with dead horses, including the following:
- Buying a stronger whip.
- Changing riders.
- Give the dead horse multiple warnings of poor performance
- Threatening the horse with termination.
- Appointing a committee to study the horse.
- Arranging to visit other sites to see how they ride dead horses.
- Lowering the standards so that dead horses can be included.
- Reclassifying the dead horse as "living-impaired"'
- Hiring outside contractors to ride the dead horse.
- Harnessing several dead horses together to increase speed.
- Providing additional funding and/or training to increase the dead horse's performance.
- Doing a productivity study to see if lighter riders would improve the dead horse's performance.
- Declaring that the dead horse carries lower overhead and therefore contributes more to the
bottom line than some other horses. - Rewriting the expected performance requirements for all horses. And, as a final strategy:
Promoting the dead horse to a supervisory position or offer the dead horse a long severance
package and then rehire the dead horse as a consultant right away.
Next batter up -
Steve Setterfield
14Nothing makes you smile more than knowing Thursday is the last day of your week. Semi retired but not a dead horse! -
Garth Forsberg
34- Beat the dead horse with a trumpet. Same result but it will be slightly more entertaining.
- Before anyone finds out that it's dead, sell raffle tickets to win a free horse. No one will complain about the horse being dead, except the guy that won, so you give him his money back. 500 tickets at $5 is $2495 profit. -
Steve H
308Test Your Reactions
This simulation puts you in the driver's seat of a car. You're driving down a road, when you see a big red hand flash in front of you,
You have to put on the brakes.
Then, the Reaction Time Test tells you how old you are, when it comes to driving.
Test Your Reactions
Bet you try more than once! :razz: -
Steve H
308
The Safety Officer
Once, an engineer, a physicist and a safety officer all applied for the same job. The Managing Director interviewed all three, and thought all were excellent. He had to think of some way to find the best person. So he told them all to come back the next day and tell him the exact height of the building. The one who was closest would get the job.
The physicist went to the top of the building, and dropped iron balls to the ground, and had his friend timed the balls. He did this several times. The engineer got out a sextant, and computed ratios of a yardstick to the building. The next day, the manager asks all three of them to tell how tall the building is. '75 feet, 2.8 inches,' says the physicist. '76 feet, 4.1 inches,' says the engineer. '75 feet, 8.4 inches,' says the safety officer.
'My Goodness, said the MD, 'the safety officer got it exactly correct. How did you manage that?' 'Well', said the safety officer, 'I went down to the planning department and looked up the height in the building records.' -
Steve H
308Hmmm, no serious replies can be parked here :smile: redemption can be obtained by the posting of anything of a frivolous nature Laraina that has some bearing on H&S or management
-
Brian Parker
24Trudy said "Nothing ruins your Friday like finding out it's only Thursday."
Yes there is - finding out on Friday that you have to work on Saturday! -
Jonathan Godfrey
15The Safety Officer knows that the records were prepared by the Engineers and Architects who built the building, and that they measured it because the records required accurate measurements. -
MattD2
339
Hahahahahaha... never trust the as-builts!!!!and that they measured it because the records required accurate measurements. — Jonathan Godfrey
Welcome to the Safeguard forum!
If you are interested in workplace health & safety in New Zealand, then this is the discussion forum for you.
More Discussions
- Free stuff
- Guidelines
- Terms of Service
- Useful Hints and Tips
- Sign In
- Created with PlushForums
- © 2024 Safeguard Forum